This Week in Theaters, January 5th, 2019

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Hello citizens!

It’s January! That time of year when all the biggest, heaviest hitters are released for public and critical acclaim! Perfect time for 2017’s Monster Trucks, right. Of course I’m being sarcastic but then again both Paddington movies came around in January and they are just lovely.

We start out 2018 so so strong! With ONE wide-release! There was a second, a horror film called Eli. But I guess someone realized “hey we didn’t put out any posters or trailers! Crap! Delay!” it vanished from boxofficemojo earlier this week. Which leaves us just a single film…

Escape Room, Horror narrative, Written by Bragi F. Schut and Maria Melnik. Directed by Adam Robitel. Starring.. the only one I recognize is Tyler Labine and I love him so that’s something. 100 Minutes

This can’t be worse than the Escape Room I saw at SIFF in 2017. At first I thought this may be that movie finally being released and thought “ah good, I sat through that trash once, easy week!”. No. Goddammit. Before I get into more details, that was the most awkward Q/A ever. The movie ended and it was …silence… for a film festival screening you know that’s something. Anyway, another movie called Escape Room. Honestly, I’m surprised we’ve not had a wide release film based upon the concept already.

So this looks bloody awful, with ludicrous traps and rooms. I’m expecting giant logic gaps, people making stupid decisions, at least one person to say “this ain’t real” and get a bloody death immediately (or semi-bloody. PG-13 and all). And some awful contrived reason behind the incredibly elaborate escape room in the trailer.

Needless to say, all four of us will be at a showing Thursday the 3rd. Keep an eye for our review.

Follow up! We really liked it! Our Review!

As for other critics – there are not any reviews on Metacritic as of 9pm Wednesday night when I am writing this. But on IMBD there are two linked reviews both of which are positive. I hope we can be pleasantly surprised!

 

Limited Release – Seattle didn’t pick up destroyer or Stan & Ollie! Boo! The other films on boxofficemojo are also not playing here but as I’ve not heard of any of them I’ll just pop ’em below.

Great Great GreatDrama narrative, Written by Adam Garnet Jones and Sarah Kolansky. Directed by Adam Garnet Jones, 80 minutes

The trailer for this is dull as hell. A woman rethinks her relationship after her parents divorce. Seems to be a new guy in the picture? With just one minute exactly, not a lot to go on, but seems to be all relationship talk with little energy.  I dunno, maybe it’ll strike you but a pass for me.

There is no metacritic rating.

 

Mojin: The Worm Valley, fantasy Adventure narrative, Directed by Xing Fei, 110 minutes

This looks like it could be a fun over the top, albeit CGI heavy adventure flick. A sequel to Mojin: The Lost Legend, these films are apparently based on a best selling fantasy series. I presume in China, as both these films are Chinese. There is no score on the review sites, but the previous film had a decidedly average score on Metacritic.

 

That’s it for this week. Early January is usually light. Expansions of high profile limited releases (not many of those this year) and dump movies. Come back next week for The Upside, Replicas, and A Dogs Way Home

 

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